While no one wants to think about the end, hospice care is an important consideration when you are the caregiver for a loved one. Planning can make a tough decision much easier. It is hard to weigh options and make informed choices when you are overwhelmed with fear and grief. Investigation hospice care options long before they are needed can make a terrible time a little easier, allowing you to use that time to be with your loved one.

When my grandfather passed away, it came as a surprise. It might be hard to believe that his death at 92 was a shock, but it truly was. His mind had long since fled, leaving him much like a large toddler, but he was happy and we loved every moment with him. Physically, he was as healthy as one could expect at that age - his balance was bad, and vision and hearing were an annoyance but not a disability. Other than that, his body was in good shape. We certainly weren't thinking about hospice care.

Within a few days, a mild cold turned into pneumonia. The hospital was always hard on him, but his lungs started clearing up and we expected him to recover. One evening, we were discussing when to move him back home, and the next morning his tests results were crazy. His organs gave up, and began shutting down literally overnight. By the end of the day we knew.

Our options were to try and fight, putting him on an all-liquid diet, pumping him full of drugs that made him nauseous and itchy, or to let go. We talked to nurses, doctors, hospice care staff, social workers. Who, at any age, feels like they can make that choice? I certainly didn't. I had to weigh his dignity and his physical comfort and his fear and confusion and his quality of life and realistically consider his possible future.

I knew that hospice care involved pain management, but they gave me much more than that. They knew what to expect. I had never been through this, and they talked me through it.

They kept me comfortable. In the movies, dying people give one last gasp and it's over. Granddaddy died slowly, over a period of days. The gave him plenty of drugs to keep him comfortable, but they also took care of me. Although I only took them up on it a few times, the hospice care staff frequently asked me if I needed anything from nearby stores or restaurants. I was bombarded with offers of pillows and blankets and hugs, and each afternoon when my daughter came to visit, someone would appear with a snack, book, or small toy to keep her content.

Perhaps most importantly, they were comfortable with Granddaddy. His last days were the most lucid he had had in a long time. He understood what hospice care was, and he realized that he wasn't going to get better. Many people, including myself at time, were uncomfortable talking about death and had trouble treating him naturally. The staff were able to answer his questions without falling apart, which helped him to stay calm.

As a caregiver, it's important to make the best choice possible for your loved one. Taking the time to consider hospice care options before they are needed can make it easier to find the right option. Whether you choose a facility or home hospice, the experience that they bring makes it easier for everyone involved.

If you are interested in reading more about hospice care and other senior care related issues, please visit www.OurCareCommunity.com - a free resource built on the concepts of "community sourcing" and "virtual networking". The result is a forum where members pool ideas, share experiences, access the latest expert information, and find creative solutions for all their elder care needs and questions.

Contributing Editor: Julie Sanocki, CNA
Julie is a graduate of the Certified Nursing Assistant program at Lanier Technical College and has over 10 years experience in elder care. Having been a family member arranging eldercare as well as a professional providing it, she understands the needs and concerns of all involved.


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